Friday, April 29, 2011

The Pawn Shops of Esser'


You see them in every space port, two bit colony city, & their tacky neon motto " The right to sell arms is the right to buy!"  They crop up all over the place offering to buy arms, equipment, etc. Their staff is knowable, friendly, & slightly creepy. They are always eager to buy,trade, sell weaponry of all different stripes. They comply with local laws & there is a null field in effect for all of their properties.  They buy at a rate of 20% percent retail market rate & sell about 10 credits off of full retail except for jolly sale days.
The cold compound eyes of one the enforcers of  Esser'
  This business is a truly neutral & sells to just about anyone including both sides in a conflict. They have on staff truly diabolic enforcers. These small, shadowy, little monsters are always lurking on the fringes of  higher dimensional space. The merest whisper of trouble & a swift psychic attack will follow. Here we see the leading edge of one of their compound eyes.
Below is a quick overview of some of the fine weaponry available in their show rooms-
 Space Patrol Marines Atomic Blaster 10 pds Damage 1d8 Credits 700
 These weapons are from old Earth & served during the closing days of  the atomic wars. These are fine weapons that were handed down from father to son. Now they can be yours. These are original Earth manufacture & not the cheap Rigillian knockoffs with defective magnetic bottles & faulty focusing rings. These are quality pieces & their value can't be under estimated. Buy now, buy in bulk, & ensure lasting freedom for your race today!
Atomic Cannon! The big brother to our very popular line of old Earth weapons! The atomic cannon was used in the closing days of the atom wars & was the watch word in speed, reliability, & atomic destruction! This is a vehicle-mounted weapon & caution should be exercised when using firing it. The energy discharge has been known to leave a fine column of ball lightning in the firing field for several milliseconds after discharge. Remember that using the larger fuel pods will produce more damage but also drain the focusing crystals.
Only heavy gravity life forms & those with an R28 rating should use this weapon near body parts. Protective clothing should be worn when using this device under battle conditions. 
Atomic Cannon! - 20 pds plus weight for fuel pod 10,20,30 pds Damage 1d6, 1d8, 1d10

Acme Death Gun - Simple easy & effective. This is a simple & effective gun which was created by the human population of Seldon 3. The gun is actually a magnetic bottle with a simple trigger mechanism, & the fususum focusing rings. The anti matter beam is released & simply destroys it target & then drops completely from the known reality matrix thus over coming the Lynsburg principle. The antimatter is safely stored within the bottle good for only 40 shots this weapon can not be recharged again after the ammo runs out. A reasonably easy weapon to mass produce. The weapon hits for 1d8 points of damage & weights about 2 pds. Notice the dual trigger mechanism for easy use by most life forms with a thumb & digit combination. Cost 300 credits per weapon.  
Deep Space Hand Held Reaction Cannon- The deep space reaction cannon brings planar weaponry into the humanoid hands today! This wonderfully simple weapon focuses a micro thin, 2 dimension anti proton beam de-ported in from the heart of a sun 6 universes away. This beam will shatter most hull plating, disrupt the physical reality of many planar beings, & is rated in JAn'dru's guide to weapons as"One of the coming centuries most promising battle field weapons, the weapon smiths of Chthul have out done themselves with this multi battle field weapon. Make sure your troops are armed with one today! ***** star rating" *
 Weight 30 pds Damage 1d10 per shot 20 shots

* Note that using this weapon within an atmosphere has been known to cause planetary atmospheric cascade plasma storms. We bare no responsibly for any mishaps when using this weapon & the 13 cycle waiting period for heavy weapons is in effect. Remember to use space suits with an M76 radiation protection rating
Two Dimensional Flat Space Weaponry- Remember that The Pawn Shops of  Esser' carry a large variety of Flat Space weapons. The storage advantages to these types of weapons are numerous & many detectors will not even register this type of weapon!* The weapon exists outside of the normal local time space continuum & with the flick of a switch the weapon goes from pixelated non existence to normal reality.*
The Pawn Shops of  Esser'* None of these claims has been tested & your local space time continuum may be subject to other effects. Many detectors can detect a faint trace of  eldrith radiation & we are not responsible for any unlawful use of this product. The term normal reality will vary with your plane of existence. Any lost or missing body appendages from the use or abuse of this item is the user's responsibly. Please remember when ordering Two Dimensional Flat Space weaponry the cost is 20x normal weapons cost because of the delicate micro circuit work involved. This weapon should not be used in or near a Type 40, 60, 05, 80 model Tardis or else full protonic inversion could result.

Just look for the sign of the space bat for the The Pawn Shops of  Esser'* near you!
As an added bonus here are the copy right free images of toy ray guns that inspired this post! Download them & print them out to use in your game today!
Toy Ray Guns From Heck! Awesome!


3 comments:

  1. I think I detect a bit of A. E. Van Vogt inspiration here. The funny thing is, I've created a shop called Isher's Deli & Pawn for the Encounter Critical my setting. Power to the Sci-Fi pulps and their fans!

    ReplyDelete
  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Yeah what meant to say before the cat hit the keyboard, was there ever. I happen to be a huge A. E. Van Vogt fan as well as a Critical Encounter fan! The pulps do rock & welcome aboard.

    ReplyDelete

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.